Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Blech
Disney: 2007
Previously on Tooncrap:
Cinderella 2 was reviewed.
Was revealed as not really a movie, but 3 episodes of a failed animated series
Prince Charming is the world's first living cardboard cutout.
The King's mood swings are a serious concern
No answer was given as to why only the mice can talk.
And Anastasia and Popeye... Separated at Birth?
Now that we've essentially gathered the oh-so-important aspects of our previous induction, let's get down to doing the twist in time. In 2007, Disney was finally stopping production of their cheapquels, the final two to be released was this one, and the Little Mermaid: Ariel's Beginning (Wasn't the first one technically Ariel's beginning? Or at least the beginning that mattered?). Now unlike the previous sequel, this one is actually a complete tale, not 3 stories that had jack to do with one another except for the fact they were in the Cinderellaverse. While that was given more negative criticism, and deservedly so, Cinderella 3 gained a far more mixed reaction, though still gaining the negativity due to being a cheapquel.
What does time travel have to do with the Cinderellaverse? Does Prince Charming finally find his long lost charisma? Will there ever be a Hudson Hawk 2? While I can't say much for the last one, I can say more for the other 2 as we review this thing.
We kick this off with Cinderella gloating about how her life has become perfect, and we get it.. through song of course. Yes, it's back to the real format of a Disney movie, plenty of songs. As we see the story of Cinderella first royal year through paintings. Then Prince Running this gag far into the ground.... I mean Charming gives her the shoes she was missing. Also, he seems to actually know the mice exist, since the last film kinda made it seem like nobody but her knew of these magic talking rodents. Meanwhile, at the Legion of Doom... Er, The Tremaine residence, The stepsisters are still annoying as hell, and Tremaine's still the cold hearted B...
I'll be good!
The song turns to Anastasia, singing about wanting someone to love. Okay, where the hell did the baker go then? I guess, despite this being the third movie, Cinderella 2 never happened, or was all an autistic kid's dream or something. And now we cut to the Godmother and the mice preparing a meal for Cinderella and the Prince, as Anastasia follows, and learns of how Cinderella;s success. in the midst of the singing, Fairy Godmother drops her wand. Really? I know the old coot's a bit absent minded, but just throwing her important magical tool like that? Even I don't buy that. So, Anastasia takes it of course, and heads back to Tremaine Chateau. She tries to convince her family, and of course, they don't believe her. But before Anastasia can do the Bibbidi-Bobbidi thing, The Fairy Godmother comes back to reclaim her wand. After the much demanded cat fight between FG and Anastasia, our magical old fool gets turned into a statue. And of course, this new magical revelation is much to Lady Tremaine's favor, As she makes the time move backwards, all the way back to the first movie.
So, with time back to the whole shoe fitting scene, and Cinderella locked away, Tremaine uses her new found powers to make the shoe fit. Cinderella makes it far too late, and now with everything going her way, Tremaine continues to rub it in, along with destroying the other shoe. So, after another song, Cinderella decides that she has to see the Prince. So, with Animal minions in tow, it's off to the palace, as she enters through the servants entrance. She's finally going to see her Prince, and this movie can end in a quick, and painless 15 minutes. That is until she encounters......
YE ROYAL DOUCHE!!!
I guess some things from the sequel are canon and some aren't?
She's never seen Cinderella before, so Cinderella just tells her she's here to catch the mice, as her ever present mousey minions cause havoc. Prudence tries to do the job, and gets the beating she's deserved since the last movie. Well, the movie's definitely redeeming itself for that part. Meanwhile, Prince Actually has some sort of charisma in this one... I mean Charming and the King are discussing the whole situation involving marriage... While having a sword fight. Certainly an interesting way to settle disputes. And after a series of pointless acrobatics, and other odd choices, they finally finish their dispute, as the Tremaines enter the castle. And much to everyone's surprise, the Prince isn't buying this BS for one minute. But Tremaine makes him forget, and this movie still goes on for another 60 or so minutes. Tremaine suggests marriage at the end of the night, and the eavesdropping mice go to warn Cinderella.
However, they don't quite make it in time, as she meets the prince, who pretty much considers her just some nutcase who's spewing a load of crap. But before she can prove anything to him, Prudence is back to send her away. The mice fill her in on the whole situation, and it's off to get the wand. So, after a food fight between the sisters, and the king threatening to behead the Grand Duke (what is with all these inductions I've done and beheadding?), the King finally meets Anastasia. And from the food fight, we go to awkward dancing. I think the point that the stepsisters are awkward has been proven well enough, thank you. Despite Tremaine's magic, the Prince is starting to realize something ain't right. Meanwhile, the King gives Anastasia a seashell that he and The queen had, and gives a sappy, but somewhat effective spiel on true love. And that of course cues a song from Anastasia. All the songs so far, have been sappy love songs. I know this is Cinderella, but does every song have to be like this? I guess it's better to have Tresse MacNeille sing this time around than have to suffer through Gilbert Gottfried, Dom Deluise, or Jean Stapleton again.
Back to Cinderella's wand woes, as she learns that Tremaine locked the wand in a dresser, and took the key. Of course, her always willing rodent buddies are off to save the day. But before they can recover the key, they wake up Lucifer the cat.. by accidentally setting his tail on fire. This distraction gets them the key. Cinderella disguises herself as a maid, which considering that was her job for a long damn time, doesn't quite work as planned. But her rodent aid still get the wand, as they try to escape the palace guards. Her bird pals get the prince, as Cinderella is about to break the spell and finally end this thing, but of course she gets caught. And to ensure that she's gone for good, Tremaine has her to be put on the next ship leaving town.
The prince is realizing more and more that this stuff don't add up, and if that weren't enough, now Cinderella's mice are talking to him. Instead of just ignoring this as some sort of psychotic episode, he follows them, as it's time for the next song. And it's the token silly song of the movie as the Gus and Jaq inform the prince of the current situation. And, it ain't half bad to be honest. The prince finally understands the whole situation, and it's off to save Cinderella. As Cinderella's put on the ship to be sent off, it's time for another song. And it's back to the somber lovey stuff. the ship sails off as the prince makes it there too late, but he jumps off a freaking cliff and lands on the ship. Where the hell was this prince in the last movie? everything finally snaps back into his head, and he remembers Cinderella.
With everything back in place, the two are finally set to be wed. Except we forgot about one minor little detail...
Yeah, her.
With the prince wanting to marry Cinderella, she transforms Anastasia into Cinderella's doppleganger. Maybe that's something she should've done in the first place. She then sends Cinderella into an evil pumpkin carriage driven by a now human Lucifer. But with the aid of her rodent pals, she gets rid of him, and escapes the evil pumpkin. Back to the castle, as the marriage is underway, and Anastasia is contemplating a face turn. And of course, before the I do's can be said, the genuine article Cinderella returns to the castle, just as Anastasia makes her face turn. the king sends the guards after Tremaine, who uses her magic wand to dispose of them. Finally planning on putting an end to the two of her troubles, she fires at Cinderella and Anastasia. Only for the prince's sword to deflect it and hit it back at her.
See? I said Lady Tremaine doesn't blow. She croaks.
So, Cinderella frees the fairy godmother, Anastasia keeps the shell the king gave her (along with another true love metaphor), And Cinderella finally marries again. The End.
And that's Cinderella 3. It's.... Tolerable. The music's much better, the animation too, and Prince Charming actually has a personality. Other than that, the plot really was kinda meh, and when you really think about it, Tremaine should've went back to the ball, before Cinderella arrived. would've made a bit more sense. Other than that, all I can say is it's tooncrap, but definitely not the worst ever.