We open Raw recapping the challenge from Earthquake to Yokozuna. Tonight's Raw will see the answer to that challenge from Yokozuna on yet another edition of the King's court. It's Vince and Macho Man at the table once more for another edition in Burlington, Vermont. But opening action tonight is a King of the Ring qualifying match between Kwang and Razor Ramon. Macho Man gives the advantage to Kwang because he took Bret to the limit a few weeks back.
Some back and forth hammerlocks to begin the match. Vince mentions that IRS is the first entrant in the tournament due to his victory over Scott Steiner. Kwang gets Razor in the corner with some hard chops. Razor turns it around with some hard chops of his own. Kwang tries a hiptoss, but Razor reverses and hits a clothesline that sends Kwang out of the ring. Eventually Kwang guillotines Razor on the rope to regain advantage. Kwang tries a back drop, but Razor turns it into a backslide for two.
Kwang regains offense shortly until Razor regains momentum by working the left arm and getting some paintbrushes to the back of his head. Razor ducks a chop and turns it around into a cross body for two. He regains the momentum on the arm. Kwang eventually turns around momentum with a spinning heel kick. He follows with a chinlock to Razor, who is sporting a cut lip, which VInce gets squeamish over, warning a possible stopped match. I get no blood in this era, but stopping a match over a busted lip? Really?
Razor goes for a back drop, but gets a knee to the nose from Kwang for two. Both go back and forth until Kwang hits a facebuster to the injured nose of Razor. Razor fights back some more after the break, ducks a spin kick, and lands his dumping chokeslam for two. He follows with several more rights, but is unable to hit a back suplex, instead Kwang lands a flying press, which Razor turns around for two. Kwang hits a big kick for two. He goes for another back drop, but gets a knee to the face and tries a Razor's edge, only to collapse. Kwang goes for another wheel kick, but misses. Razor tries again for the edge, and lands it for the three to qualify.
Didn't really like this match for some reason. I don't know what it is, maybe they didn't click as well as I'd have hoped. Razor did fine, but Kwang just doesn't feel all that good in the ring. Not even his spin kicks. He had a good match with Bret, but Bret could make a broom look like Shinsuke Nakamura. Razor didn't really lead him to a decent match. But in the end, the right man went over and the right man is in the King of the Ring tournament.
It's time for the King of the Ring report with Todd Pettengill. He reminds us that both Razor and IRS have been qualified to the elite eight for the tournament. Next week, it's Sparky Plugg vs Bam Bam Bigelow to see who faces Razor. In other news, Rowdy Roddy Piper returns to action at King of the Ring to face Jerry "The King" Lawler. We cut to a video of Roddy saying there's no such a thing as a king because we all eat and poop. Elvis was called king, but he was just some nice guy. This is some crazed rambling honestly. Wouldn't shock me if ol' Roddy was a tad soused during this. Roddy Piper drunk during a promo? What an absurd insinuation.
Crush is in action next against perhaps one of my favorite jobber names ever, Ray Roy. No relation to Rob Roy. Crush is also now feuding with Lex Luger apparently. But I already hear you asking "What about Mr. Perfect?" Well, Curt Hennig is gone from the company. Turns out that his back issues were still very prevalent, and as such he was still unable to compete, so he left the WWF. We'll see Mr. Perfect again in the tail end of 1995.
Roy goes for a rollup, but he gets a two and a nice hard savate kick to the face for his troubles. Hard headbutt from Crush followed by a slap to the chest. He follows with a leg drop and a big backbreaker. Crush follows with a hard clothesline and his press slam. Crush hits a heart punch for the three as Macho Man shills two nights of Friday the 13th on USA. Part V and Part V 2.
We head to a garbage dump as it's time to see Duke "The Dumpster" Droese. There's no obstacle deep enough or high enough to stop him from climbing his way to the World Wrestling Federation.
We recap a previous episode of Superstars where Jerry Lawler is mocking Dink. Doink shows up with a box of not one, but two cream pies.
But le gasp! Doink hits Dink with the pies. Could it be that my beloved Matt Bourne is Doink once more?
Nah, it's just Jeff Jarrett. Threw two cream pies. Never drew a dime.
But sadly, it's the genuine clown article up next in action. Doink and Dink have arrived to take on Mike Terrance. Tarrence gets a headlock, but Doink gets a snapmare. Terrance charges, only to be tripped. Dink distracts Terrance and eye pokes him in front of the ref. DQ THE CLOWN, DAMMIT! Jarrett is on the phone reveling in his enjoyment of harrassing Dink. Speaking of which, Dink continues his heelery by getting in cheap shots. Doink turns around a top wrist lock and gets a nice backbreaker. He hits the whoopee cushion (Complete with, and I kid you now, a frigging fart sound effect) for the quick three. I never thought they'd make me hate face doink, but canned fart noises certainly adds another notch to that belt.
They follow with something that actually is pretty cool. A look back at Earthquake's sumo career complete with candid comments from the man himself. He was 24-0, a record for a North American. He talks about his era as Koto Tenzan and his run in the WWF being successful. It's domething different and I actually really like it.
But now for something I've been lukewarm on. The ol' King's Court. Lawler brings up Roddy's ramblings and wishes that Piper would confront him to his face. Piper's movies are so bad that when they play at the drive-in, people ask for their gas money back. He introduces his guests this week, Yokozuna, Mr. Fuji and Jim Cornette. Cornette saw the pictures of Earthquake as a sumo, and he thought it was some old news reels. In the words of the immortal Monkees, that was then and this is now. He compares Quake to the armchair quarterback. Cornette knows what Yokozuna means. It means grand champion of sumo. What this boils down to is that Yokozuna has turned the challenge into a challenge to a sumo match. So yes. Next week is Quake and Yoko wearing nothing but a sumo thong and a smile. Enjoy that image already.
It's time for this week's Undertaker sighting. This time from a trench worker. So he's stolen deli meat, wanted his urn polished, was hanging around schools like a creep, starting fires, getting his tires checked, and now he's sleeping in a trench like some local bum. Helluva vacation he's having.
Our final match of the night is Mabel (With Oscar) in action against Mike Bell. Bell works down Mabel with strikes to start, but Mabel hits harder chops and a clothesline. Savage gets the news that Earthquake has accepted the challenge of Yokozuna in a sumo match next week. A big suplex and a leg drop to Bell from Mabel. Mabel finishes Bell off with a splash in the corner and a side slam for three in a quick squash. Vince and Savage bring up that Mabel will face Pierre on Superstars to determine the next spot in the King of the Ring tourney.
We end Raw with the buildup for the sumo match. Lawler is in, what appears to be the bathroom with Earthquake. He mentions again that he's accepted the challenge, as Lawler keeps trying to get his ass kicked by claiming that Quake is scared.
This was a rather dry edition of Raw. Kwang vs Razor was kinda dull, the squashes were fast and without much substance, and the King's Court was pretty to the point. I did like Earthquake's history in the world of sumo being brought up and given a video package and the image of Undertaker sleeping in trenches is hilarious, but other than that, there wasn't much to come back to this week. This is a C- episode. A fart noise of a show.