Oh, it's a doozy alright...
Sunrise: 1991
It's often said that one should be thankful for what they have, but in dealing with the induction du jour, sometimes it's better to be thankful that for what we didn't get. Case in point with Doozybots, America's answer to Gundam.
In case you've been living under a rock, or just not an anime fan, you're probably well aware with Mobile Suit Gundam, an anime series by Sunrise that made it's debut as far back as 1979, and is still around to this day in one form or another. It was, and still is massively popular in Japan, and many parts of the world. And with that success, Sunrise decided it was time to try to take on the most dangerous market of them all.
The American market.
But surely the kids in America (Whoa-oh!) were far too stupid to enjoy an anime with drama, action, and giant robots. Especially in an age where the Ninja Turtles were still the most dominant force both in animation, and paraphernalia. So if any show was going to have a chance at success, it would need to go with the flow, and Gundam as it was just wasn't going to cut the mustard. So, Sunrise sold their souls to the devils of conformity, and what we almost got was definitely a facepalm worthy experience. To this date, only a trailer for the show exists, as it never saw the light of the small screen.
So, let's take a look at this failure of a trailer, as we review this thing.
We open with an announcer telling us of a new exciting action comedy series coming in 1991. HEY KIDS, GET READY FOR DOOZY BOTS!
Doozy Bots, seriously? Likely that was just a placeholder title, but it's definitely not selling me on this exciting new series.
Through the magic of perhaps the most unenthusiastic singers ever, we meet Professor Doozy, who's "a wacky one." And if this trailer is any indication, not paying attention as a monkey steals his sandwich, and staring into a beaker as if he's seeing ST. Elsewhere inside is certainly pretty damn wacky. He's also the head of a teen science club. And here they come.
Hey Kids, count the cliche characters.
Standard Jock leader extrordinaire? Check.
Cheerleader/Only female in the group? Check.
The fat guy? Check.
Early 90's skater dude, and cripple pulling double duty by also being the token black guy? Check and mate.
Ladie's and gentlemen, our protagonists, the goddamn Burger King Kids Club!
Oh, and two kids who add nothing to the show? Check that as well.
So, according to the plot of this inanity, the teen science club have been assembled by Professor Doozy and his daughter to merge their bodys with robots in order to take on Doozy's other robots who have gone rogue, and are now planning to build an army, and rob the world of FUN!!
Yep, not global conquest, the destruction of the planet, or anything logical. They wanna rob the world of FUN!
So this is where the Gundam aspect comes in. The kids merge with the Doozy Bots, which are desinged similar to Gundams from the anime/manga. So, that's kinda cool, giant robot battles, and every...
Wow. Just wow. The premise of this show is essentially midget robot fights. And yet somehow this never got greenlighted.
So, after all that exposition AKA midget robots, we finally get to the action of the show, as the prof's rogue bots attack a power plant, so they can, and I wish this was something I could make up, power their robot turkey, which lays eggs that hatch into more members of the evil army. The Doozybots show up, and use their super powerful weapons, like... Bubblegum blasters, footballs, lassos, and skateboards that turn into parasails for some odd reason. The Doozybots make jobbers of these robots, and the trailers ends with the annoying narrator telling us that with Doozy Bots you'll get Bots of Action, Bots of fun, and Bots of Kids (the hell does that mean).
And that's the Doozy Bots trailer. The plot is beyond dumb, the characters are beyond cliche and stereotypical. The trailer really does nothing to sell me on how this show could possibly be a hit. I mean, I know this was the early 90's, but even I think kids wouldn't be that dumb to watch this crap. This is definitely the 2nd worst possible use of an anime license ever.
Yep, I said 2nd.