We're one week away from the Royal Rumble with lot of crazy things going down. An interview with Goldust who as of late is showing just how amorous for Razor Ramon he is. We're also getting Undertaker vs Isaac Yankem D.D.S (which like I said last week makes me a bit giddy), some sultry Sunny and... sigh... more Billionaire Ted.
But opening action tonight is Marty Jannetty in action against Owen Hart. Early arm work to start with Marty gaining control. Owen locks a hammerlock, but Marty turns it around into a front facelock. Owen sets Marty on the second buckle, but Marty hops over him and gets an arm drag takedown. Owen starts to shove Marty, but Marty gets in some punches. Owen goes behind Marty, but Marty blocks him and hits a clothesline for a two count. After a chinlock, Marty gets a shoulder block. Owen comes back with a belly to belly suplex. He doesn't cover, but instead hits a boot to the lower area and follows with a backbreaker.
Owen whips Marty to the corner, but Marty turns it into a springboard cross body for two. Owen lands a big enziguri and covers for a two count. He locks in a chinlock, but Marty escapes with an arm drag. Owen tries for a sharpshooter, but Marty throws him off. Lawler and McMahon focus on Goldust, as Lawler says maybe Razor has enrolled Goldust in the "panty of the month club". And when his joke bombs, he just goes full out saying it's like the "fruit of the month club." Oy.
Back in the ring Marty gets in a clothesline, but Owen is right back with a face rake and a gutwrench suplex as we go to break. When we return, Marty gets in a facebuster. Owen reverses a whip and sends Marty to the corner, but Marty comes back with a flipping bulldog. Powerslam by Marty who goes up, but chooses to clothesline Owen out of the ring instead. He tries to suplex Owen in, but Owen reverses. After a few counters, Owen turns things around into a bridging cover for the three. A solid opener. Fast paced, lots of good looking offense and had some decent heat to it.
Todd Pettengill is here with the Royal Rumble Slam Jam. Pettengill shills the pre-show "WWF Free-For-All" as there will be a drawing match between Hunter Hearst Helmsley and Duke "The Dumpster" Droese. The Royal Rumble card is finalized and we get some comments from Diesel who isn't worried about Vader Time. We also get another Vader vignette.
We get a video of Sunny playing pool, cleavage hanging out. I mean, I get why this is going on, obviously, but the nagging part of me is going "we killed the women's division for this?"
Up next, it's The Ringmaster taking on Matt Hardy. Headlock takedowns by Ringmaster, but Hardy rolls him over for a two count. Lou Thesz press from Ringmaster with a series of punches, a definite staple of what would be Austin's moveset. He gets distracted by the referee as Hardy again rolls him up for a two count. Ringmaster follows with an elbow and a back body drop. He takes Hardy to the corner and lands some chops. Matt tries a weak right, but gets brought right back to the corner and smacked with some rights and some knees.
Knee drop by Ringmaster, who cockily covers for two. He rams Hardy's face to the mat and tries for a back body drop, but Matt gets in some boots. He tries a suplex, but Ringmaster turns it into a front suplex. Another cocky cover, but he lets Matt up. He chokes Matt in the ropes and tries to drop his knee on the rope, but Matt avoids. He tries a whip, but Ringmaster lands a stun gun, sending Matt throat first into the ropes. Million Dollar Dream by Ringmaster gets the win in a really good debut match. Matt worked very well with Austin, and getting to see Austin's ring work on the show at last is also great. Sadly, the Ringmaster gimmick is super bland.
We get a return vignette for Shawn Michaels as we get closer to his Royal Rumble return. THe same stuff we've seen for the last few months with the forfeiture of the IC title and the collapse. It feels like they're telegraphing Shawn's Rumble win a bit too much, but part of me is just getting ready for this pity party stuff to come to an end.
Up next, it's The Smoking Gunns taking on The Spiders (The soon-to-be Headbangers). Small package by Billy early on. He hits an early version of the fame-asser and tags in Bart who slams both Spiders and follows with dropkicks. Tag to Billy as they hit the sidewinder to finish this quick match.
This week on "Billionaire Ted's Wrasslin' War Room", Billionaire Ted talks about how be bought a network, the world series, and coorized classic movies, but he can't seem to be able to buy the WWF. His yes men say that the WWF has better athletes, while they have the greedy, disloyal has-beens from the 80s. He suggests that they should call the Huckster the Boy Toy. This is just some shameful garbage. And we're far from done with this.
Up next, it's an interview with Goldust. Vince is in the ring as Goldust tries to rub his hands over him. Vince is focused on if Goldust means what he says about Razor, or if he's praying on the homophobic fears of men. Goldust asks if there's an extra microphone in his pants or if he's happy to see him. He is selective to find that one man who can give him the worst time. And that's when he makes his move. He quotes Tootsie by saying "Razor Ramon, I want you so bad, bad guy. More than any man or woman can ever want a human being." This is their little secret, don't forget the name of Goldust. A really good promo using Goldust's mindgames in full effect. Too bad Lawler sours it with "He's here. He may be queer. Get used to it." and yes, I know that's not the most homophobic thing he says about Goldust.
Up next, it's the main event of the evening. Isaac Yankem D.D.S taking on Undertaker. Lawler jokes with Vince over his Goldust interview and claims he's not homophobic like Vince. Again, that's a load of bull. After a staredown, Isaac feigns backing off and tries a cheap shot, only to take some boots from Undertaker. He whips Isaac into the corner and hits a clothesline. Big body slam from Undertaker who then cluches at the face of Isaac. Whip to the corner from Taker, but Isaac comes back with an elbow to the face and a clothesline. Taker sits up, reverses a whip, no-sells a kick to the face and catches Yankem for a tombstone, only for Yankem to escape.
Yankem drags Taker to the outside, but Taker regains controls with some strikes. He chokes Yankem in the corner as Paul Bearer kisses the urn chains. He breaks the ten count and continues to attack Isaac on the outside, throwing him shoulder first into the steel post. Lawler gets up from commentary and goes after Paul Bearer, grabbing the urn chains. Undertaker chases after Lawler who runs away to the entrance. Yankem catches Taker and rams him into the post as we go to break.
When we return, Isaac is in control, laying in some strikes to the midsection and locking in a half crab. As Yankem locks Taker in a bearhug, we hear from Dok Hendrix that Goldust will be talking about his match with Bret Hart next week on Raw. Taker regains control in the ring with a back suplex. Taker ducks a clothesline, but gets caught in a powerslam by Yankem. Isaac hits a couple elbow drops. He takes his time continuing offense and tries for a tombstone, only for Taker to reverse it with a tombstone and an elbow. Another tombstone gets the win for Undertaker in a pretty decent main event. Definitely good early signs of what would be a more important feud down the line when Isaac becomes a far more important character.
Dok Hendrix is with Goldust backstage. Goldust starts his promo, but Razor attacks goldust. He bashes Goldust with a garbage can and throws him over the table. Goldust catches Razor with a low blow as we go to break.
Cut to Sunny in a bathtub talking about how "we did it for almost an hour". Can't lose that straight male demographic after all this gay stuff, am I right? I may be playing paranoid, but Part of me can't think that having a "supposedly gay" man get beaten up then cuting to a naked woman in a bathtub feels extremely blatant. This definitely feels like the Vince Russo era of car crash creative already.
Back to the brawl as Goldust and Razor end up brawling outside in the snow. Razor tries to smack Goldust with a shovel, but Goldust avoids. They brawl some more before Goldust throws Razor into the side of a truck, then escapes in his car.
I'm a bit mixed on this Raw. The good: Marty vs Owen, Ringmaster vs Matt Hardy, The Goldust interview, and even the brawl with Goldust and Razor as it shows how heated this feud has become. The bad: Billionaire Ted, the Sunny stuff (label me all you want, this is blatant horny man bait) and the homophobic overtones of almost everything involving Goldust. While Dustin is doing a fantastic job in the role, having this character become blatant "faggot" chant bait is extremely bothersome, and something I know is going to bother me more as time goes on. Despite that, he does feel like a star and an important character right now and this Razor Ramon feud has proven that so far. Final rating for this Raw is a B-.
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